Awesome Parenting Fails

October 4, 2011

So C was running earlier today and fell and broke a plate.

Then C was running and fell and banged her knee.

Then I had to listen to some really annoying whimpering.  After I got her to cut that out, I told her to come talk to me, and in a loving, sympathetic voice, had the following conversation:

Me: So how did that happen?

C: I was running and the bathroom floor was wet and I fell.

Me: I bet that hurt!  How did you fall?

C: I wasn’t careful.

Me: So what could you do to be more careful?

C: Not run.

Me: Exactly.  How can you remember that?

C: Um, I can tell myself.

Me: Where are some good places to run?

C: The trampoline. (Note: I’m not sure when she’s ever been on a trampoline.

Me: Where else?  How about outside?

C: Yeah, outside.  And the CARPET!

Me: Inside running in general really isn’t a great idea.  You were on the carpet earlier when you broke that plate.  So where are some places outside?  How about the yard?  The playground?

C: Yeah!  Run outside like a butterfly!

Me: Yes.  So how is a good way to remember?

C: I could say in my head.

Me: Say in your head is good.  Or talking about it is good.  Maybe you could tell your friends at Daily News that you ran, and hurt your knee, and you learned running inside is a bad idea.

C: But I want to run all the time!

Me: But you learned that’s not a good idea.  Or you could tell R, or Daddy!  Tell them what you learned, like a teacher, so it doesn’t happen to them.

C: I don’t want to tell to R.

Me: How about Daddy?  How about Lola?  Or just tell me?  Teaching people is a good way to remember things, and you should find a way to remember this.

C: I DON’T WANT TO TELL ABOUT IT.

Me: Fine.  Whatever.  Okay, go brush your teeth.  Good parenting totally wasted.

C: *pouts*

I mean, seriously, I think I was saying all the right things here.  Why can’t 4-year-olds participate in good parenting ideas?

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